When You Just Can’t Get Started: Understanding Low Motivation in Young People

You know that feeling when you stare at your to do list and think, “I should really start this,” but your body feels like it’s made of concrete? Maybe you keep telling yourself you’ll begin in five minutes, then ten, then tomorrow. Even when you want to get things done, it feels almost impossible to make the first move.

If that sounds familiar, you are far from alone. In my counselling work with teens and young adults here in British Columbia, this is a common concern. Low motivation can feel confusing, frustrating, and sometimes scary. But it has real causes, and there are ways to gently rebuild your energy and direction.

This post is here to help you understand what might be happening inside you and offer practical steps you can start using right away. It is educational and not a substitute for therapy, but I hope it helps you feel understood and less alone.

Is It Laziness or Something Else Entirely?

Many young people worry that low motivation means they are being lazy. You might hear your own inner voice saying things like:

• “Everyone else can do this. Why can’t I?”

• “If I really cared, I would try harder.”

• “Maybe I’m just not the type of person who gets things done.”

These thoughts hurt. They also miss the truth.

From a clinical perspective, what most people call “laziness” is usually something much deeper. When your mind and body are stressed, overwhelmed, or emotionally overloaded, motivation begins to fade. You might feel foggy, tired, detached, or stuck. This is not about character. It is about capacity.

I see many young people juggling school pressures, part-time jobs, sports, social expectations, family responsibilities, and the constant noise of social media. That kind of load wears down even the most driven person. When your brain senses that you are overloaded, it moves into protection mode. This makes starting things feel harder, even when you know they matter.

Nothing about this pattern is a sign of failure. It is your nervous system asking for care.

What Is Getting in the Way of Motivation? A CBT Look at Thoughts, Feelings, and Actions

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) helps break this down in a simple way. Motivation is not one single switch that turns on or off. It is shaped by a loop between your thoughts, feelings, and actions. When one part of that loop gets stuck, the rest follows.

Here is how the loop might play out:

1. A thought shows up
“I’m so behind that there’s no point trying.”
“This assignment has to be perfect.”
“If I mess this up, everyone will notice.”

2. That thought creates a feeling
Stress. Fear. Shame. Hopelessness. Pressure.

3. That feeling leads to an action or inaction
Avoiding the task. Scrolling your phone. Napping. Doing something easier instead.

4. The lack of action creates more difficult thoughts
“See, I can’t get anything done.”
“I’m disappointing everyone.”
“I’ll never catch up.”

This is how the loop strengthens itself. Your brain is not trying to sabotage you. It is trying to protect you from discomfort. Unfortunately, the strategies it uses, like avoiding the task, tend to keep you feeling stuck.

The good news is that once you understand this loop, you can start interrupting it in small, manageable ways.

How Do You Break the Cycle? Try the One Small Step Strategy

When motivation feels low, trying to tackle something big right away can make you shut down even more. This is why behavioural activation focuses on the smallest possible action. Not finishing the whole assignment. Not cleaning your whole room. Just taking one small step.

Here is how the One Small Step strategy works:

1. Choose the tiniest possible action
Instead of “write my entire English essay,” try:

• Open the document

• Write one sentence

• Set a five minute timer and stop when it rings

Instead of “clean my room,” try:

• Pick up three items

• Put one thing in the laundry

• Clear off a tiny corner of your desk

2. Pick something you can do even on a low energy day
Small steps count. They help your brain build trust that you can begin, which makes the next steps easier.

3. Notice what shifts
That little spark of “I did it” is not meaningless. It adds up. It tells your nervous system that starting is safe.

4. Keep the focus on beginning rather than finishing
Finishing comes later. Right now, momentum matters more than perfection.

Even if your first step feels too small to make a difference, it is still progress. Over time, these small actions help rebuild motivation without overwhelming you.

Why Does Rest Matter When You Are Struggling to Start?

It might seem strange, but part of rebuilding motivation is making sure you have enough rest. When you are constantly pushing yourself, judging yourself, or running on empty, your brain does not have the energy it needs to focus or begin tasks.

Healthy rest can look like:

• Taking short breaks that actually recharge you

• Spending time in nature, which many young people in BC find grounding

• Having quiet moments without screens

• Saying no to extra responsibilities when you truly need downtime

Rest is not avoidance. It is fuel.

Moving Forward With Support

If you see yourself in any of this, please know you are not alone. So many teens and young adults share these struggles, even if they do not talk about it openly. Low motivation is not a flaw or a failure. It is a signal that something in your life or your emotional world needs attention, compassion, and support.

In my counselling work with young people, we explore these patterns together with warmth and clarity. We look at the emotional load you are carrying, the thoughts that keep you stuck, and the small steps that can help you feel more grounded and confident again. You do not have to figure it out on your own.

If you are curious about how counselling might help, you are welcome to reach out or book a consultation. I am here to support you as you find your way back to energy, direction, and hope.

This content is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health treatment. If you're struggling with low motivation or mental health issues, please consult with a qualified mental health professional.